Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Embarassing white people everywhere

As you may have heard on the show, this past weekend was a disaster. My producer (Roser) and I were asked to play in a celebrity basketball game hosted by Branches of Life. We were honored and thrilled to participate, but knew nothing about the event. As it turned out, Roser and I went to the game and instantly realized that we were 2 of the 4 white guys in the entire arena. So here we are in the gym playing in what amounts to a black celebrity all-star game, featuring the likes of comedian Joe Torry, rapper Chingy, etc. This is now the funniest thing ever. The guy that put together the event, Greg Motley (who runs Branches of Life) is thrilled that we showed up to play, and knows how funny this is. It should be mentioned the stands are packed and there are no white people. We are now the "white boys." So here we are at this game and the goal becomes not to act overtly white... and that goal could not be accomplished.

We are in a layup line before the game and here comes Roser trying to be Tracy McGrady. This within itself is unacceptable. He is going to throw the ball off the backboard and catch it and then lay it up. Roser throws the ball off the board, jumps up (if you want to call it jumping), the ball goes way over his head, and he lands on a girl and breaks his foot. I cannot believe this is happening. The whitest thing to ever happen before human eyes. He broke his freakin foot in the layup line? All we need to do is to not to highlight our whiteness, and Roser pulls this. I was just beside myself. Many of you have asked if this story was made up. Unfortunately the story is true and the proof is below. My producer now sits on the other side of the glass with his foot in the air. Roser would like to apologize to white people everywhere. Talk about representin'...